In Which Kia Saves The Rockpools

Kia: Oh my god.  It is nearly five in the morning.  And not in the good way.  Are you EVER going to shut up and let me go to bed?

Kia’s Brain:  WHEEEEE!!!!  VODKA!!!

Kia:  Please.  Bed.  Please.  It is soft and comfortable.  Please.  Bed.

Kia’s Brain:  PANSY!  THERE ARE MURLOCS TO SAVE!

Kia:  We hate murlocs.  They bring all their uninvited friends to the party and have an extremely annoying sound effect.

Kia’s Brain: Not THESE murlocs.  They are innocent victims of abuse and persecution!

Kia: Naga are never good, I grant you.  However, it is LATE.  Or, I suppose, EARLY.  Depending on one’s time zone.  Isn’t it way past our bedtime?

Kia’s Brain: You’re the one who kept pouring Cape Codders down our throat.  Don’t blame me for my current thirst for blood.  YOU THERE!  BLOODWASH IDOLATOR!  YOU MUST PAY FOR YOUR CRIMES AGAINST THESE INNOCENTS!

Kia: OOOHH!!!  ARCANE SHOT HIM TO DEATH!

Kia’s Brain: Arcane Shot?  Are you MAD?  We’re a SHAMAN, DAMNIT!

Kia:  A shaman?!

Kia’s Brain:  Don’t look at me; this was all your idea.  Remember that Twitter poll?  You asked Twitter if you should roll a shaman or a warlock.  It was a tie.  You told Chris that he could pick the winner.  He picked shaman.  Now you’re stuck with it.  FEEL THE AVENGING FIRE OF MY LAVA BURST PROC, YOU SCUM-SUCKING NAGA MISCREANT!!

Kia, aghast:  Sweet mercy.  How much vodka have you had?

Kia’s Brain:  Why do you ask these irrelevant questions?  ON WITH THE NAGA SLAUGHTER BY OUR AVENGING SHAMAN SISTER.

Kia: Well.  I suppose since her engineering is almost up to snuff, it’s not that big of a deal that I now have an elemental shaman sister.  Lizzyuh will be so proud!

Kia’s Brain:  Lizzie is a resto shaman, you drunken sot.  Resto.  Not elemental.  Resto.

Kia:  Hey, watch where you’re slinging the insults, sweetie. You are the one that currently can’t see quite straight.

Kia’s Brain:  DIE, YOU INSOLENT NAGA SCUM!  YOU WILL PAY FOR YOUR INFAMY!

Kia:  Infamy?  Really?  Infamy?

Kia’s Brain:  Look!  There are baby murlocs to save!

Kia: Okay, yes, fine… the baby Rockpool Murlocs are cute.

Kia’s Brain:  I WILL SAVE YOU, BABY ROCKPOOL MURLOCS BABIES!!

Kia:  Oh lord, what have you done to yourself this time, Kia?

Kia’s Brain:  LOOK!  A quest we’ve never done before!

Kia:  We’re a Loremaster.  How can you possibly think that…

Kia:  …sweet mercy.  You’re right.  We’ve never done that quest before.

Kia’s Brain:  I WILL SAVE YOU, BABY ROCKPOOL MURLOCS!  You will live to gurgle another day!

Kia:  MULTI-SHOT THE NAGA BASTARDS!

Kia’s Brain: Shaman.  We’re currently playing a shaman.  Lava Burst.  No Multi-Shot.  Lightning.  No arrows.  Lightning.

Kia:  …right.  Shaman… wait a second.  Didn’t we do a shaman already?

Kia’s Brain: That was on Azgalor.  You didn’t move her, remember?

Kia:  Oh, right.  Honey, if you wanted a shaman on Rexxar, why didn’t you just move her?

Kia’s Brain: We’re unemployed, remember?  Big giant move to Tennessee to live with Chris, remember?  There will be no toon moving.

Kia:  Right, right.  So… shaman.

Kia’s Brain:  We needed an engineer.

Kia: That’s true.

Kia’s Brain: And we would have taken a lot of flak if we had just rolled another hunter.

Kia:  Also true.

Kia’s Brain: So we asked Twitter, and Twitter said… shaman.

Kia: It was technically a tie.  We should roll a warlock.

Kia’s Brain: Oh, we did that too.  It’s just a bank alt at this point.

Kia: Cynwise will not be pleased.

Kia’s Brain:  There was only time for one more alt before the expansion.  Shaman won.  We’ll do a warlock later.  This is all irrelevant.  Move on.  MOAR NAGA KILLING, KTHXBAI.

Kia: So… shaman.

Kia’s Brain: Why are you so slow?  Yes.  Shaman.

Kia: Do we like the shaman?

Kia’s Brain:  We don’t hate her.  She is a very capable member of the Sisterhood.  And the insta-cast Lava Surges are win.  Especially when there is three of them in a row.

Kia: Are we ever going to do anything with this… shaman?

Kia’s Brain: Hell no.  We play hunters, remember?  We’ll level her to 90 and then she will bask in comfortable retirement making scopes for our bows.

Kia: I can get behind this plan.

Kia’s Brain: I am so glad that you are finally on board.  Can we please return to the naga-slaying?  Lightning Shield is going to drop off if you don’t get your act together and start killing things.

Kia: I don’t know how I feel about this bloodthirsty new you.

Kia’s Brain: I AM AN AVENGING ANGEL!  BEHOLD MY UNLEASHED WRATH!!

Kia:  Next time, my sister drinks on her own, damnit.

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This entry was posted in Kia's Brain, Long Live The Sisterhood, Uncategorized, What An Alt? Yeesh. Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to In Which Kia Saves The Rockpools

  1. Marsailli says:

    omg i am dying irl hahahahaha

  2. Dhevon says:

    That quest definitely pulls at the heart strings. Every time I quest through there I tell myself that I’m going to skip it, but I have yet to be able to look at those adorable little guys and leave them there. In fact, I would probably try to move every crate to sea if the game would let me.

  3. Prinnie Dood says:

    Is it bad that my brain works like that without the alcohol?

  4. Navimie says:

    Hahahahha OMG you are hilarious, woman!

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